Entry 08

Have you taken the time to notice the qualitative difference between a day of work and day or non-work?

For work maybe you have to use your body. Maybe you are having to look at numbers. Maybe you are having to speak to a lot of people. Maybe you have to analyze and solve puzzles. All of this is activity and we are requiring some sort or another for most or all of the week. Even on the weekends when working is over, you have to work. Maybe you have to be a parent and look after the children. Maybe you have to spend time with your lover. Unless you are in silence with your lover, I think that you are still working. What time is left for you to be still and do no work?

By my experience, when no work is being done, you are coming home. When there is nothing to be done and you are not doing anything, you are coming home. You have to be still to come home.

You have been working all day and all week. When you go up early, you began to prepare your mind and body for the day. You are thinking about all the things that need to be done and when you will do them. Then, you work all through the day. Your mind is spent, your body is spent. And so the long drive home begins. You get into your quiet car and because you have been busy all day, you notice that it is quiet and silent. You are tired and work is over so there is no need to use your phone, listen to the radio, or do anymore working. When you get home, you sit in your car. You don’t even go inside because when you go inside you have to prepare for bed, and that will stop the non-working. So you just sit there. The light is gone. It is quiet and nothing is happening inside, nothing is happening outside. I am sure that you know this feeling. That is the feeling of non-working which is stillness.

It is so sad that we only come home to this stillness sometimes. It only comes into our life here and there. We are working so hard for tomorrow, but tomorrow never comes, there is only today. That stillness is the feeling of you. You have been there subtly this whole time, but on top you have been working, being always busy, far away doing something else. That stillness is the most precious thing. If you begin action out of stillness, everything becomes a joy. Everything will become an action out of love. That is why it is better not to do something at all than to do it with a poor attitude. This is backwards living. You should be always founded in your peaceful stillness. Action should be coming from this space.

It is fake to do something out of duty. You should never do anything out of duty. Duty is cheap. It is fake action. To do something out of duty arouses the emotion of pride, but action out of duty never comes from your true being so it can never be authentic. It is a pseudo action which elicits the feeling of noble pride. Instilling duty is a dirty trick! It extols the being of humanity in a criminal way! How can you do anything out of your own true being from duty? Duty is a mask! You wore the mask, but you forget that it isn’t you. And they don’t want you to remember. If you remember that your duty is a mask, then how will they continue to exploit your ambition? So they don’t want you to remember.

They want you to vote. Non-voting is not an options for them. You can vote left or right, but either way they want you to vote. They have many clever arguments for it, they have been working on each on very carefully so that you cannot deny their validity. You have been raised in a society which is founded on so called “democracy.” You have participated. You’ve driven on these roads. You used these public spaces. So naturally they argue that it is your prerogative to vote. They made the rules of the game. They made the politicians. It is a game they want you to play, but the game is rigged. You only have these options. These politicians give the illusion of choice. They have many different platforms, and they only want you to chose. But I will not chose any of them! I am not a follower of anybody!

I have looked at the state of humanity and by my judgement, there is not a single candidate who pursues justice for the oppressed state of man. I am using my own judgement, it is not decided by anybody else. There are some candidates whose platforms I find parallel to my own conclusions. I give credit where credit is due. And I will give some credit to these politicians whose platform reflect a progressive mind. But I have not found a candidate who I can walk with. These politicians are so unfit to be leaders of men. And not only are the politicians far from true democracy, the entire system of representation is far from democracy. I cannot participate with the arguments of the politicians, and I cannot participate with with the system which supports them.

They say that if you do not vote for the best, then you are voting for the oppressor. I did not ask to play your game of politics. You invited me and you think I accepted the invitation, but I did not! And you expect me to adhere to your arguments and conclusions. Justice for the human mind is now far beyond the reaches of your game. Your game is small, petty, inadequate. Truth and humanity cannot be within the reach of your game. Your entire game is dependent on the exploitation of human mind, how can you say that playing the game would be an effort to move it towards justice? Your game is already fixed. It is already achieving it’s outcome, and all the participants have been fooled.

If they keep you dumb, then you will always live with the illusion of choice and authenticity. I am not giving anybody a consolation prize. We have all been fooled. I won’t be fooled any longer, and I want pretend that it is okay. I am not trying to hurt anybody’s feeling. It is quite the opposite in fact. I care about humanity and I want them to break their bonds. You are not chained, but you think you are. What is holding your is a weak illusion.

I’ve heard that zookeepers will will train young elephants to cohere by chaining it to something so that it cannot run away with only a thin rope. When it is young it learns that it is bound, so it will not try to escape. It’s efforts are futile. The elephant grows very big. The African Bush Elephant becomes 14,000 pounds and strong enough to turn big cars and lift heavy things. But the Elephant has been conditioned since youth that he cannot leave his perimeter. He is so strong now that he can easily break his bonds and escape, but will not because he is conditioned.

That is how man is now. He has been conditioned. He knows the rules and he thinks that the rules are only fair. He is chained by false ideas, and if society can keep him dumb, then he will never know. Thus, humanity has been suppressing man’s intelligence. They wan’t him to vote so that the parts of the machine keep on spinning. They want him to work hard so that he cannot make a fuss. Many things they are doing which are criminal!

Despite how inhibiting alcohol is, they glorify it. Alcohol is the substance that keeps man’s intelligence stupid. And the substances which provide potential for knowing, they condemn. Mother Earth provides the substances for our growth and potential. The society goes on condemning because if you happen to get a glimpse of truthfulness, then you will be a problem for society. You will go to jail for having herb! You will go to jail for having mushroom!

They want you to follow a well trodden path. They have made a very foolish saying now that is considered almost scripture, ‘why reinvent the wheel’? They are saying, ‘why play by other rules, come play by ours. In our rules, there is safety and security’. Pssh, come one – life shouldn’t be lived for the achievement of safety and security, it should be lived for the sake of living and enjoyment. You will see, in many countries it is happening already; when people are happy, safety and security is taken care of. When people are living joyously, you cannot drag them into war, you cannot make them compete. When people are happy, they will work joyously with all the people they work with. When people are happy, they will become creative and adventurous.

How can man’s intelligence flourish is he is always busy maintaining the institution of work, the institution of his family, the institution of his values and morals? He will have no time to jump in to the deep end of life. This idea is deeply ingrained. I have to admit it. It is me! I am the one who is trying to uncover a deep repression. I am living my life. I cannot help but wonder about my future. As long as I am wondering about my future, sometimes I hear the voice of society telling me that I can have fun for some time, but eventually I shoul fulfill a role. Now I am saying the opposite. I am not waiting to have a family. I am not waiting to have a carreer. I have not future ambitions for life. Next year, I might be homeless. In two years, I can be sailing the Caribbean. In three years, I could be a teacher. In four years I can be sweeping the floors in the hallways of my old high school. Whatever happens, I am excited for it! I am founded in my being and I know what you are forgetting. Life is life. It does not have a quota. There is no purpose. There is no goal. If you think about these things, then you have missed. Your life is right now. It’s got zest and flavor, you just have to find that out. I will show you what I mean.

I could say many things which aren’t true about right now. Un-truth is saying right now that I should think about my financial burden. I should think about when I will continue my education. I should think about what to do next with my family. But none of that is right now. Right now I am in this beautiful city Provo. The sky is dark and gloomy. I am sitting in an empty coffee shop. There’s only the sound of people in quiet conversation. I have a cold cup of coffee in my hand. I am saying how I feel. I am enjoying myself completely right now. I love to write. My writing is only a fantasy partially-actualized. I do not know who I’m writing to. The reader is imaginary so that makes it a fantasy. I am thinking what I want to say to you and it is coming from my heart. I want you to live well! I want you to be a flowering of your full potential.

I don’t want you to drudge through life like you have been doing. I don’t want you to condemn yourself. You are so full of condemnation, in reality nobody is condemning. I am asking you to get out of your own way and live like I do. I live so fully. It is not about vice or virtuous. I am not virtuous. I am drinking and smoking. I read scriptures and go to church, but it does not make any difference to my being. All of those things, I am doing fully. I am living it. I enjoy the most awful depression. It is really awful, you should see it. I live the most precious moments when I am so full of contentment unprecedented. I can cry easily about anything. It is not about vice or virtue. It is not about morals. I am just living and enjoying each chapter of life. I am not going towards anything. I am not looking for God. I just am now. Here there is Godliness. Here there is moralistic behavior. It is always here. I can’t say what I will to tomorrow. But everything about right now feels perfectly right. There is nothing wrong about what I am doing.

I am making this blog right now, but I am not doing work. I am not doing anything out of necessity, it is out of my enjoyment. I have to exercise a little effort to make my words comprehensible, but that is also out of my enjoyment — I enjoy doing it! So I am not doing work. I am just being, and from my being comes all these words. This is how I feel.

People are not working. This virus is causing people to become frantic but there is no reason to be. The virus is in the population, so what? You may die, but if you die there will be no problem for you because you have only died. Many more things have happened to you than dying from Corona-virus, so what is the problem? People were dying by shark attack, influenza, cancer, freak accident. All these things were happening before but it lost it’s novelty as a threat because it has always been there as a risk. You could die by murder tomorrow but you already knew that. You already assumed the risk. The Corona-virus should be good for other reasons. Now you can rest. Now you can meditate. Now you could do nothing. Now you can do something creative. Now you can enjoy some loving. And when the Corona-virus is over, you can take that space with you back into work. You can smile at your co-workers, because you love to smile. You can work with excitement because your life is now. It is happening, don’t forget to live it! You can engage with people today because tomorrow they could be gone, or maybe tomorrow you could be gone.

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